Note: this blog originally published in September 2011.

It’s funny how life works—some days I feel like I have everything figured out: where I’m going to live, what my career will be, when I’ll get married, how many kids I’ll have… essentially my “life plan,” while other days I feel like my future is so unknown.

Guess what? It’s okay to not know.

The way life works

Over the years, I’ve learned that life never turns into what you expect. This is not a bad thing, it is simply the way life works. It just so happens that it is difficult to plan exactly how your life will turn out. So many unforeseen events occur; some may be positive, while others are more negative. You may meet new people that may change your life, you may be exposed to a new opportunity that changes your life, or you may have a new experience that changes your perspective on life. Regardless of what happens, it is not worth the energy to plan it all out ahead of time.

I had a friend tell me I get too caught up in the “numbers”—essentially, the planning. So maybe I have had ideas in my head of the ideal age to be engaged, married, have kids, graduate from college, have a career figured out, the list goes on. But who doesn’t think about that at least a little bit?

I even had a class that reported the “best” ages for various life milestones as voted on by young college students. The exercise seems ridiculous now that I think about it, but it was relevant at this point in the class.

Everyone has different milestones

What I’ve really begun to realize is there is no “right” age to experience any milestone, as there is not a “wrong” age, either. Life is different for everyone, and crossroads occur at many different times.

Instead of putting your energy into making plans, put your energy into planning new experiences that expose you to new things—as this is a great way to grow and learn more about yourself.

In the end, what matters is that you are following your heart and doing what makes you happy. You only get one life, so be true to yourself and do what makes you happiest, regardless of what anyone else thinks or what may seem “acceptable” to society.